Wal-Town Meets a Double Degree

Anyone who has talked to me knows that I’m not a big fan of my program. I have expressed disdain for my classmates who have repeatedly shown themselves to be genuine business students: looking to make a quick buck with a semblance of ethics.

Of course in an academic setting, the currency is not quite the CAD as we assume. For a business student, a quick buck could be a suave first impression with a professor (or instructor), or a classmate that sneaks you better grades. I have never been impressed with this characteristic of my program-mates, and somehow, I have managed to nearly-graduate without having adopted this feature. Perhaps it’s my total unawareness of money, or my perfect terror of doing “the wrong thing”

Anyway, tonight I realized just how horrific my education has actually been.

I was watching a documentary on these anti-Walmart activists who drove across Canada and picketed in front of various Walmarts. The documentary had a dual purpose: to educate the viewer on the “evils” of Walmart, and to report on the experience of the activists.

I know that this documentary is incredibly biased, and it didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know. I wasn’t filled with the sudden desire to return all of my goods purchased at the store, or start boycotting the chain. However, it finally occurred to me that there were people and organisations who were genuinely being abused by the retail superpower, and that as such, Walmart had demonstrated very little initiative, if any, to make things right.

But that wasn’t even what really got me. The thing is, in my 5 years as a BBA student, Walmart has shown up in all of my textbooks as the ultimate model of all things business. They’ve shown up in operations books, marketing, strategy, even HR. All of these books tout the greatness that is Walmart: how a man who focussed on customer service, and giving employees lots of power ended up creating the most powerful retailer of all time. They all talk about Walmart like it’s the best thing since sliced bread, and encourage us BBA’s to become more like Mr. Walton.

I got annoyed hearing the same thing over and over again, but tonight, I realized exactly why my peers were disgusting, back-stabbing, money-grubbing dirt-bags. They were being educated by these publishers who thought Walmart was “dabomb.” Walmart is just the unfortunate embodiment of everything business. Apparently, to do well in business, be like Walmart.

It only means underpaying your staff, refusing collective bargaining, promoting child labour and lording your power over other members of the supply chain.

That’s what my top-notch education at the fifth-best business program in Canada taught me. When I grow up, I want to be just like Sam Walton. My want my life’s purpose to be making a quick buck for those all-important shareholders.

Three cheers for Sam Walton!
Hip Hip Hooray!
Hip Hip Hooray!
Hip Hip Fuck you!