Sustainable Behaviour

New relationships are super exciting.  They can consume your thoughts, and you just can’t seem to get enough of each other.

Though I can’t say from experience, I’m betting that this is unsustainable behaviour.  On the one hand, I feel like I should just enjoy the ride and talk to each other all the time, see each other every day, share every (or at least inordinately many) thoughts.  On the other hand, every friend that I know who has sustained a long and healthy relationship has told me that the most important part of a relationship is space.

How long can two people simply be happy with each other before they need space?  I can only imagine that two people would come to need space at different times, probably making things difficult.

I can certainly say that my academic and teaching productivity has taken a noticeable hit.  Unfortunately, with graduate studies, a decrease in productivity isn’t really noticeable until it’s way too late to do anything about it.

How do you make sure that in the long run, you have two complete individuals, and not some composite of 19 tenths of a person?  Do other people even think about this stuff?!?


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  • December 2010
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